I won’t unpack this part of my life just yet, but basically I was completely blindsided by all the negativity people threw at me when my baby bump didn’t look the way they thought it should an emergency C-section in place of the lavender-scented, candlelit Earth Mama pushing my baby out on a cloud delivery that I thought I’d get and postpartum depression in place of the sweet, snuggly newborn phase that I thought comes with being a mommy.Īnd even after all of that I was still dealing with people coming at me about how I somehow wasn’t up to their expectations of what or how a mom should be - and that was on top of all the bitchiness from the show. When I came to, I was dazed and confused. I didn’t know where I was, and I didn’t know where my baby was. Getting 'Crazy'! What to Know About Selling Sunset's Season 5 Reunion Read article When I could finally see my baby - Christian, named after my rock of a husband - holding him was intensely painful. The clash of hormones left me with a nasty case of postpartum depression, which was only made worse by pretty much every post on the Daily Mail saying I faked my pregnancy and hired a surrogate. But the real kick in the cooch? I was back to filming a week later. I had barely healed, nor did I have the emotional capacity to deal with my ruthless castmates.